
Before our hike to Big Bluff on the Buffalo River
I think the phrase above means it is something that is difficult to do. Not sure. However, one thing I am sure of is that it is a difficult thing to measure growth and positive change when you’re in the moment. Most of our “learns” and our ways of articulating “what God taught me” or “what I figured out” are retrospective. Most of the time for most of us our ability to get our minds around something that has changed in us sounds like: ”I didn’t know it then, but now I see that_____________.” Or “I lived like I believed this thing was true, and now looking back I see that I was changing, that perhaps God was changing me.”
Working with young people (our GPS group is ages 17-20) who are in the midst of a personal and directional upheaval is great fun, and meaningful for me. It is also hard to measure progress outside of the increased open-ness, overall level of smiles and laughter, and occasional new insights that our people bring at the times you least expect it. We are a group of very different people- who are growing to like each other very much- that is evident.
But regarding growth, effectiveness for our people, I wish they would give me more. Right now. I want to force the learning. I want to force the change. I want to be the Holy Spirit and get inside people’s heads and hearts and help them to see truth to the point of complete “ah ha!” moment.
I am not good at this techinque. As a matter of fact, even though I try to force the change in people here- I resent it when I see others do it somewhere else. It bugs me when we give tons of energy to creating “God moments” rather than gathering and celebrating the ones that are happening all over us all the time. I suspect the people I judge for being in the God business, who seem to be forcing change and shoving stuff down people’s throats would judge me too, when I try to manipulate people through other means to get them to change. Actually, I bet they would laugh, because the attempt is feeble.
On my good days, however, I just help our people help others, and ask them a few good questions. I share a scripture, quote, and/or story, and expose them to other people who understand their place in the world. When we do this, great things happen- and I don’t always get to see it, and I am sure many who experience those great things will not even know how to articulate what has happened until after the fact. Sometimes it will take years. I am ok with that. (More and more every day!)
What does all of this have to do with “catching lightning in a bottle?” Well, I have comitted that we will do our work, and give students a chance to reflect, and be good with whatever they reflect back to us. If they don’t give us a bunch to work with regarding a verbal or written reflection of “growth” or “change”- its all good. We still love our people, and do our work. God is big enough to use it all- and we trust that. Some of our people love to work out what they’re learning in discussion and writing. Some of them tend to shut down when asked these types (What are you learning?) of questions in an organized fashion. Yet, you get them one on one the change is obvious and they share all kinds of good stuff that is honest, real, and reflects growth.
Their growth is also reflected in just how they approach people and situations on a practical level. We can see it- sometimes they can’t- just yet.
So, with all that being said- I’m going to share some November thoughts from students over the next few days. They might be things they wrote down, or things I heard someone say.
I can’t change people. We can’t catch lightning in a bottle. We can provide people with a space where change can occur, and is occurring whether we know it now or not.
We appreciate your support and are looking forward to finishing up well this fall, and hoping for more groups in the spring.
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