gather round the coffee table for the "informal" learning circle!

Today we go on our first GPS Tulsa fall retreat- a trip intended to involve camping, but may in fact involve cabins (more on that after we return) because we are experiencing our first freeze warning of the fall.  I’ve heard that all the best families camp.  Its because when you camp, nothing ever goes as planned.  There’s not enough space for all your stuff, the weather isn’t what you expected, dad snores, and sometimes you wake up looking a skunk in the eye about 2 feet away (this happened to me back in the day- spent the rest of the night sleeping on top of a state campground picnic table).

Really what happens is a great opportunity for adventure, and all the possibilities that can be birthed from it.  A retreat that has elements of adventure (meaning- we’re going to do this thing, and we’re not exactly sure how its going to turn out, lets try it!)- is a great chance for a group of people to put to test a great quote from our friend Parker Palmer:  ”If you can’t get out of it, get into it.”

Stuck out on the trail, stuck in a car with people you don’t know that well, stuck on that zipline, stuck overlooking that beautiful valley, stuck believing its time to tell the truth because you trust these people, faced with a choice to “live in the light”  as John says in the Bible…. well, it doesn’t all sound difficult or terrible.  But, when we create space to engage our identities as image bearers of God- and live out as creators and contributors with a group of people trying to do the same thing, something great happens.  We face points of choice.  We see God and each other in new ways.  We tell the truth, and hear truth with more mercy than is normal when we are engaged in our self absorbed busy life.

This is the beauty of retreat.  This is the beauty of committing to a group of people over time.  This is stuff God uses to alter our direction, and create memories that influence our future.  This is stuff worth getting into.  (cause once you’ve signed up for it, you can’t get out of it.)

(Kinda like life.)

Here’s a few learns from our recent experience.

• Service makes us feel like saviors who rescue the broken, while Justice means God does the rescuing, but often he works through the united power of his great and diverse community to do it.
• The goal of service is to help others, but the goal of Justice is to remove barriers so others can help themselves, and look to a Savior with little obstruction.
• Everybody is normal till you get to know them.
• Our group would never choose to hang out together on their own merit- but now their gathering produces more laughter and goodness than I would have imagined 2 months ago.
• 3600 lbs of bikes to the metel recycler is a lot of jacked up bikes.  They get heavy.
• Our past influences us greatly- and every part of it can be used by God to make something great in us.
• Grant wants to work at the zoo.
• People older than us have something to teach us.
• Conner needs a compass (or hard wired GPS in his body.)
• Its fun helping people, together.  The people we help have something to teach us as well.
• There is great value in commitment.
• Everybody has a kite they’re carrying around, that is your gifts and experiences.  When you use your gifts that kite tends to take off, and everyone around gets to see and enjoy the flight of it.  When you keep them to yourself, carrying that kite gets a bit awkward and cumbersome.
• Imran plays a mean version of “Sweet Child of Mine.”
• Dinner together is important.
• People are very helpful when you are trying to find a lost teenager deep in the city.

Please continue to pray for us- that our students and all the people we work with come to believe and live out the mission they were created to live.

Cause- if you can’t get out of it- you gotta get into it!

ck

This was the word from a good friend this morning.  He asked how we’re doing (we meaning my family).  I said, “Really good.  The financial challenges have been hard- but everyone is doing great overall.”

Then he said it- “Persevere.”

Hang in there.

Don’t give up.

If you know its God’s deal- keep going, do whats right.

While you might get discouraged- don’t stay there, there’s more adventure around the corner and you won’t want to miss it.

Persevere.

The more you hang in there, the more stories that will be told and the more stuff to be thankful for.

Don’t forget why you did this in the first place.  Remember who you are.  Never forget who God is and how His love and care for you is bigger than what you know.

Don’t be afraid to express your weakness.  Apologize.  Ask for help.  Build alliances.  Be honest.  Keep it real.  Say no to the job when one competing for your time is related to you.  Say yes to the one life you have to live.

Persevere.

Live it well.

Remember that side stitches work themselves out over time.

Remember that uphill leads to a summit that precedes some downhill sweetness.

Remember that going against the wind may not have a flip side today (like a hill climb) but there will be another day when the wind is at your back.  Thats a great day.  Enjoy it.

Persevere.

Good day everyone.  I am here to report that GPS Tulsa had its first session with 5 awesome students this past Tuesday.  We expect 2 more to sign up this week as well.  I have so much to say about our first day together, but if you want the whole scoop- we’ll just have to get together over lunch and I will give you the 3 dimensional deal.

1st United Methodist provided a great setting for us to consider some big ideas.

That being said- here are 10 observations (peppered with a few opinions) about our initial gathering:

1. 1. 1. 1. 1. 1. • Grant, Conner, Imran, Lyndsay, and Justin are beautiful people.  Knowing our students so much better now after sharing a road trip around downtown, and a meal together, just seals in stone the idea that they are unique and have a big time contribution to make to this world.  We like them.
                  • The team of Beth, Paula, Nathan and Mitch really provided fat support, and it was fun for all of us to come around these young adults with some love and food.

• • • • • • • We sat in front of the courthouse and talked about the question “what do you trust?”  A nice, possibly homeless dude named Nathan joined in our conversation.  His perspective on trust was helpful for us, and he liked having some folks to talk with.   The experience informed a discussion about trust, and value.
            • Sometimes it is harder to heat up lasagna than to cook something up fresh.  It helps if you read directions, especially if you are an aerospace engineer.
  • • • • • • Conner and Grant just met, but actually went to elementary school together and knew each other as kids.
• I am blessed to have great people around me.
• Our spot on Quaker Ave is just right for this (although a fridge would be helpful.)  It feels cool, the location is right, and students are comfortable there.
• This format of training, service, teaching and counseling is valuable.  The students are worthy of investment- and they will be investing in children in Tulsa all year long.  Cool.
• We visited two beautiful places in Tulsa:  1st Methodist Downtown, and Global Gardens on W 21st st.  They provided a great context to deal with issues of love, service, and responsibility.
• This is fun, but there is much work to do in creating stability for this experience- including getting all the students fully funded and expanding the community of people who invest in young adults discovering their unique role in God’s big story.

Remember you can contribute in all kinds of ways- we just are trying to provide one way to do that.  I am blessed to be a part of this.  We can still take students before Sept. 1.  Shout at me if you are interested at sendtochrisking@gmail.com.

More coming!

Someone once told me that ministry was building bridges to help people get from where they are to where God wants them to be.   Being a hack carpenter- building decks for my house that may not be the most sturdy or level, I know how inadequate I would be at building a bridge of any scope.  Bridges come in all shapes and sizes and accomplish things as simple as providing a way for a person to walk over a shallow creek (like the cool little suspension bridge on the back side of the island at New Life Ranch).  They can also be massive in scope and require unbelievable vision, resources, and energy to produce.

The other thing that is interesting about bridges is that in order for them to fulfill their purpose, people need to take responsibility to move across them.  The bridge doesn’t take people, or cars, or whatever, and move them from one side to the other.  It provides a way for the person to engage, to move forward under their own power, to get to the other side.  The bridge makes it possible- and yet the “bridge crosser” is responsible.  This is a beautiful thing in that a given in this equation is the ability and strength of the bridge crosser to make it over.  It’s the bridge builder’s responsibility to create a way across.

Bridges require people to give input at various levels in order to be constructed, right?  I can be the project manager, builder, purchaser, quality control officer, and HR dude when I make a bridge across a ditch in my back yard.  And a fine bridge it will be!

However- the bigger the bridge that I am involved in building- the less I am involved in the entire operation.  I am best operating in a specific role and trusting others to fulfill their own specific role.  Some valleys, or rivers, or spans require big time vision- and big time operation.  Might this be your bridge?

Or maybe this is the one that looks more like you:

What I know now is this:  getting in on doing ministry is a beautiful thing.  It is worth being thankful for.  And, there can come times where your purpose is  to build new bridges.

CQ Missional, and our educational projects the CML and GPS Tulsa are bridges.  They are designed to help people who are in a specific stage of life, with specific needs- move from where they are, to where God wants them to be.  Students in Tulsa looking for life direction, for a vocation, for some purpose, for some people to share this search with- get the opportunity to walk across the bridge of GPS Tulsa together.  We get the privilege of creating the context for this discovery.  By the way- this will be a blast to get going!  People who are young adults but a little farther along, perhaps they have graduated college, or have been working a job for a few years, get the opportunity to walk across the bridge of the CML together- serving a community, creating new life in neighborhoods, and taking a chance on their own vocation shift.

Right now we are putting together what looks like a foot bridge, the kind you can wear sandals while walking across, or even go barefoot in the process!  However- the span between where 1000s of 20 somethings are, and where they could be is huge.  I pray for wisdom and community to join in building the right bridge to help you adults figure out their purpose in life.  This is a Golden Gate type of need.

Whats next in the bridge?  Raise more scholarship money, raise awareness of how we can serve young adults, make more friends and offer real support to help our clients make courageous decisions.  In other words, keep moving forward.

I am thankful today to be a bridge builder.  What does your bridge look like today?  Are you walking across one?  Are you in the middle of building one?  What does Ministry look like to you?

ck

There are two voices I hear in my head.  They are similar to the ones described by Henri Nouwen in his book Spiritual Direction (and others.)

One voice says, “Make sure people are ok with you.  Be pleasing, impressive, and set yourself up to be loved and respected.”  Listening to this voice can set a person up to be a “hyphenated” person.  I’m a teacher-counselor.  I am a pastor-outdoor leader. I’m a worship leader musician- leader of a non profit. I’m a Christian-person of the world.  I am not of this world- very much a part of this world.

If you don’t like a part of me that is a big part of me, I usually have another part of me that should be ok with you.  This position in life can curtail the deepest fears that I may not be acceptable, lovable, worthy of relationship.

There is another voice I hear, and I hear it at times when I know it will be loud and clear.  These times include times where I listen, times where I engage the Bible, times in the wilderness, times when I observe the beauty of those I love, times when prayer isn’t asking for things- but is more about listening and loving.  Here’s what the voice says- “Whatever you do, stay close to the heart of God.”  This voice that calls me the son of God, the child of the loving Christ, the target of the Spirit’s support…. it resonates and informs the things I do, whether “hyphenated” or not.

I can work at our new canopy tour in the Buffalo River Valley in the context of staying close.  I can listen and counsel all the while I am staying close.  I am a father, a husband, a musician- who makes his choices staying close to the heart of God.

Friends- as we work together in exciting new projects like GPS Tulsa, ask me what voice I am listening to.  What about you?  Is there a voice that resonates with you as an image bearer of God?  Does this voice affirm your ability to create, to contribute? Or, is there a voice that keeps you on edge to “conform to the pattern of this world” by goading you to continually please, impress, or position yourself for success.  What do you do about that?

The late artist Rich Mullins brought me back to my original inspiration for a life based on being an image bearer of God as I browsed his biography last week.  He said- “We were created to create.”  I remembered seeing him play his music, with his friends who called themselves “The Ragimuffin Band”.  Their music was folksy, loud, emotive, and more meaningful than much of anything I had experienced in my life at age 24.  He sang of communion in a literal and figurative sense, he expressed to God that he was “shaking like a leaf” and never really had it together, and he thanked God for the color Green.

He sings: “And the wrens have returned and they’re nesting
In the hollow of that oak where his heart once had been
And he lifts up his arms in a blessing for being born again
And the streams are all swollen with winter
Winter unfrozen and free to run away now
And I’m amazed when I remember
Who it was that built this house
And with the rocks I cry out

Be praised for all Your tenderness by these works of Your hands
Suns that rise and rains that fall to bless and bring to life Your land
Look down upon this winter wheat and be glad that You have made
Blue for the sky and the color green, the fills these fields with praise.”

Rich was created to create, and God’s creation always reflects its creator.

What were you created to create today- or maybe, this year?  May we help each other live in this knowledge and encourage the courage required to be a creator, and not just a consumer.

ck

Have you taken the time lately to consider what your role is in someone else’s story?  What kind of “role player” do you make?  What kind of character are you when you’re a supporting actor?  What words get used when its the same situation, but you’re not the star?

I’m spending with week with about 85 young adults on staff of a summer camp and we’re asking this question.  What do you think?

We just had some of the CQ Missional Team over for some good eating and home made ice cream and we were talking about what it is we do.  We say we help people discover their unique role in making the world a better place.  I believe we do that in several ways, and thats good.  We believe that everyone has, as a created child of God, something unique and valuable to offer.  We believe in the people we serve- and we help them believe that they play a role unlike anyone else in history- and that is a beautiful thing.

The question that comes up, though, is huge.  Can people in their searching to discover “their thing” forget about what we would call in church “God’s general will” for people?  Is it possible that people miss the boat in their search and “journey” and forget that there is a way of living out of gratitude for what God has done- that is characterized by a life of thankfulness, taking responsibility, and integrity?

Tony Campolo was speaking to students and faculty at John Brown University when I was doing some adjunct work there and he asked students to fill in the sentence they would hear from time to time from mom or dad.  It went like this:  ”I care more about you than about what you do for a a living.  I just want you to be ______________.”

Whats the answer?  The crowd in unison shouted back:  ”HAPPY!”

True.  This is what we tell our kids, and what many of us have been hearing from those who love us most.

Tony, on the other hand, heard a different word from his mother, and in fact many of his classmates heard the same word.  It went like this:  ”I just want you to be __________.”

Whats the answer?  Students didn’t know.  His answer was:  ”GOOD.”

“I just want you to be good.”

Good people are humble, they know there is a God (and they aren’t Him), they look out for others, they stay married, they stay engaged in their faith community, they are nice, and they make a habit of telling the truth- even when its hard.  Not that they don’t mess up, or even do bad things… because good people are just, well, people.  But for them, goodness is a little more important than happiness, and contentment and joy flow from pursuing what is good.

Terry Ewing told me (among others) that people who seek after their own happiness first and foremost are the most miserable people he has met.  He knows- his counseling practice has been full of people who are hurting, and have sought happiness above all else.

So my question is, since we are in the business of helping people find “their thing”; Can people find their thing, their unique role and ignore general ways to live that have been prescribed for all men?  Can people really find their true identity, and not be true to an identity made for humanity,  first?

I have some ideas- but I’m curious what yours are…

ck

As we prepare to meet new students signing up for GPS Tulsa, and as this journey is taking me into conversations with new people and new friendships.  I am reminded of how much I enjoy getting to know people.  Each person (including you, Mr/Miss Blog Reader!) has such value and every story is interesting.  You are the only one of you, ever.  On a deeper level, as relational beings- we each long to be known.  So while I love enjoying new relationships, there are a few that have deepened over time in which I where I know my friend, and they know me.  I hear a song during the day, and I can text the title of the song to my friend.  My friend knows what I’m thinking and shoots back.  They get my jokes, and know my failures.  They accept me and enjoy me.    There are a few friends like this in my life who remind me through their love that I am known and that I am loved.  With their help, they have helped move me to a deeper truth where (in the words of Brennan Manning) I have accepted the fact that I am accepted.  As image bearers, we long to be known and when we’re not sure this is true, we live lost.

I want to remind you today that you are known, and you are not alone.  You are, in fact, completely known and people can give us a “dim reflection” of this beautiful truth that is much bigger than you or I.  Don Chaffer writes some straight forward words about his experience in the ground breaking solo work “You were at the time for love.”

And I used to bathe in tears at night

Cause I felt like I was on my own

I used to think I would never be

Completely known

I used to hold on tightly

To the sorrows that I owned

But they were all I knew

They had run me through

And they had left me

All alone

I used to pray every day

That God would mend what’s torn

Now I see the only way is to die…

To die…

And be reborn

I have finally found a way to live

In the presence of the Lord

- Don Chaffer “Completely Known”

Being known by another human being is a gift, its rare these days, more rare in our culture, and it resonates with our deepest image bearing self.

What do you think?